MERV GRIFFIN’S CROSSWORDS
Another item that can be checked off my 100 Things To Do Before I Die list is “Be A Contestant on a TV Game Show.” Back in September I competed on Merv Griffin’s Crosswords but wasn’t able to discuss it until the first airing November 5. The episode is being re-run Wednesday, December 19. Angelenos can see it at 3:30 on KNBC 4 and Orlandoans can tune into WRDQ/Action 27 at 8:30pm. The times for the rest of the country are here.
BACKSTAGE STUFF
On Tape Day, I arrived at 7:00am with three changes of clothes that were not white, patterned, or logo-ed. They liked the green shirt I was wearing but made me remove my cotton undershirt because some of the white was visible at the collar. (Imagine their surprise when they found the skin beneath it was actually whiter.)
The standards and practices person went through the 20-page contract with us and we learned that the producers retain the right to NOT award prizes. For example: If the national news pre-empts a bunch of shows, as it did during Katrina, the production company isn’t legally required to pay.
At 10:00am, once everyone’s questions were answered and the producer had gone through all the rules and mechanics of playing the game, the first contestants were chosen. The rest of us were confined to the holding area which was appointed with tables, folding chairs, snacks and magazines. There was also a TV so we could watch the action on the stage.
Even though Merv Griffin’s Crosswords is a 30-minute show, it takes the production team an hour to complete a taping. Podiums have to be moved, camera and sound problems occur, and the giant puzzle board experiences a glitch now and then.
One thing that doesn’t slow down the game is host Ty Treadway. Like Alex Trebek, he has to keep everyone’s name straight, keep an eye on who’s in the lead and read every single clue. It’s a tough job. The day I was there Ty was battling a head cold but remained upbeat through all six tapings. He’s a total professional.
They put me on the final show of the day and I passed the time meeting the other contestants and watching them play. Some of the sharpest players in the holding room didn’t fare as well on set. Here’s why:
PLAYING THE GAME
Merv Griffin’s Crosswords starts out with Players 1 and 2 answering the crossword puzzle clues and spelling their answers. After the first commercial break, Players 3, 4 and 5 are added. Known collectively as spoilers, these contestants can unseat the leaders and take their money with one correct answer. In the first episode that day, a woman answered one question—the very last one of the game—and automatically went to the Final Round.
Around 4:30pm we were escorted to the green room where watched the second-to-last show and were miked by the sound people. Ty stopped in to wish us luck and to check the pronunciation of our names. After that we were led to the studio. As Player 5, I sat offstage as the first round was played. At the commercial break they brought the three of us spoilers onto the set to join the game. The lights came up, we made our way to the podiums, and Ty introduced us.
SPOILER ALERT! If you’d rather watch the show December 19 without knowing the outcome, skip to VISITORS.
Whatever strategy I had planned disappeared as soon as those cameras came on. It was everything I could do to look relaxed. My interior monologue went something like this: “Is this ringer working? How did he know that answer? Why did they take my shirt? Am I sweating? What if I choke and end up on YouTube?”
I tried to ring in a few times but Player 1 was on a roll and the round finished with me in the same place I started. During the commercial break, I calmed down and strengthened my resolve to answer at least ONE question. Midway through Round
Three I finally got my chance. No one else remembered the Charlton Heston film The Omega Man. I rang in, spelled “o-m-e-g-a” and moved into first place. I defended my lead by answering four more answers. At the end of the game I had earned $2,400 and qualified for the Final Round.
The last commercial break was a blur. The standards and practices person was there as the crew reviewed the do’s and don’ts of the Final Round. “Speak clearly. Let Ty finish the clue before your respond, etc.” Someone handed me a bottled water which I promptly spilled on my shirt. They rushed me to wardrobe where a blow dryer was employed to erase the spot. Before I knew it I was standing with Ty Treadway about to start the Final Round.
He was very encouraging, but once the cameras came on, my main thought was, “Everyone’s staring.” With 1:30 on the clock, I asked for the first clue. I nervously spelled “b-u-b-b-a” and moved onto the next clue, gaining confidence with each correct answer. With a few seconds left, I solved the last clue and won an XBOX 360, a week in Cancun and an additional $5,000 for my trouble. Everyone came back onstage for the last shot and, after signing some papers, we were all free to go. I headed home, gave Daryl the news, and then wondered when I would get my winnings.
Things you might not notice watching the show at home.
• Many contestants live in LA but use their hometowns on the air.
• Winnings aren’t disbursed until four months after the airdate.
• Crosswords is shot on the stage next to Hannah Montana.
• All name tags are returned to be re-used.
Contestant coordinator Kathie and her team were very organized and pleasant whether it was administering the audition questionnaire, prepping us for competition, or calling us with the air date. It’s not an easy job, but they never let us see them sweat.
I must give a big thank-you to my friend Jim who made me watch the The Omega Man in high school.
VISITORS
Our friend Juliet was in town and we had lunch at Billy’s Deli, a Glendale institution for almost 50 years. Waitress Evelyn—famous for her tableside banter—offered Juliet this Thanksgiving zinger: “They’ve got a new breed of turkey called the Hilary Clinton. It comes with two small breasts, two large thighs and one left wing.” Evelyn’s got a million of ‘em, folks but this is the first one suitable for a family audience.
Our buddy Nate was here this month, too. His first night, the three of us went to Café du Village in Larchmont for a delicious meal of French/Mediterranean fare. Driving there, Nate mentioned that all he needed to complete his visit to California was a celebrity sighting. “Somebody cool like Joel McHale from The Soup.”
STAR SIGHTING
As we left the restaurant that night, Nate’s wish came true. Joel McHale, host of E!s The Soup, walked right by us. I quietly pointed him out to Nate but Daryl said “Hey, Joel! We love your show! We’re going home to watch it right now!” Although surprised by the shout-out, Joel thanked us and headed to his car.
We couldn’t believe it. The three of us continued walking along Larchmont asking each other “What are the chances?” We were looking in one of the shop windows when Joel appeared again. This time, he introduced his wife Sarah, told a few jokes and invited us to a taping.
We said yes immediately even though Nate would have to reschedule his flight home. I felt bad about that but the additional time in Burbank allowed him to tour the Disney Studio lot and to visit the Disney Archives.
THE SOUP
Once upon a time there was TV clip show called Talk Soup which debuted in 1991 on E! Its host was the charming Greg Kinnear who left to become an Oscar-nominated actor. His successors included the less-charming John Henson, the always goofy Hal Sparks, and the stunningly beautiful Aisha Tyler. As the show’s content shifted from Ricki Lake excerpts to reality programming clips, “Talk” was removed from the title. The revamped program debuted in 2004 with host Joel McHale.
The Soup’s slogan says it all: “We watch TV so you don’t have to.” With just a green screen, some props and a small audience, Joel presents a half-hour recap of the week’s stupidest, funniest, and most outlandish TV moments. He cracks wise on everyone, himself included. It’s a simple premise but McHale and company make us laugh every Friday.
The live taping was no exception since it included some of our favorite clips of the last year. You might hear us laugh throughout The Soup Presents The Best of the Worst Daytime TV Moments when it airs Monday, December 10 at 8:00pm. Joel was just as funny in person and talked with us during the course of the taping. He even posed with Nate for the attached picture. We thanked Joel and promised to come back for future shows. A big Thank You to Nate, too, since none of this would’ve happened without his visit.
CAMPO GORILLA RESERVE AT L.A. ZOO
Thanks to our friend Cynthia, we got to preview the new Campo Gorilla Reserve at the L.A. Zoo. It’s as lush as the gorilla habitat at Disney’s Animal Kingdom and houses two of its former residents, bachelors Hasani and Jabari. They share the space with family members Kelly, Evelyn, Glenda and Rapunzel.
Because it was an evening preview, some of the environment and it residents were difficult to appreciate, but you can see how beautiful the $19 million exhibit is in this slide show. I hope the elephant habitat the zoo is working on is just as spectacular.
Thank you, Cynthia!
THANKSGIVING AT THE O’NEILL’S/SOLVANG WITH DIANA
We’ve spent every Thanksgiving in California with our friends Shawn, Rob and the O’Neill family. The turkey is always moist, the table is beautiful and the company is top notch. After the meal, we play games and watch Christmas movies. We miss our families during the holidays and we are grateful to have friends that welcome us into their home.The next day we took our friend Diana to the Danish village of Solvang. We hit our usual stops: Jul Haus, Little Bit o’Denmark restaurant, Solvang Antique Center and the neighboring Santa Ynez Mission.
THE HISTORY BOYS AT THE AHMANSON
The last day of the month, Daryl and I went to Alan Bennet’s Tony-winning drama The History Boys at the Ahmanson Theater. Set at a 1980’s English prep school where the faculty is readying its students for university interviews, the play explores issues of power, class, gender, unrequited love, politics, ethics and tradition.
The script does a good job capturing the mix of youthful bravado and teenage cynicism of these highly educated boys, but the set changes kept taking us out of the narrative. Even when moving between two identical classrooms, the stage went black and a large screen appeared with erratic, black and white videos of the students going to class, studying in the library, and horsing around to uptempo British pop music. Designed to camouflage moving scenery these breaks had the opposite effect.
Act I’s repeated references to classical poets, a scene played entirely in French, and a rambling narrative frustrated some of our fellow playgoers. Many did not return for Act II, but Daryl and I liked The History Boys. It’s a play full of small moments which needed a more intimate space than the Ahmanson and a simpler set design. The film version of The History Boys, featuring the original London cast, airs the morning of December 6 on Cinemax. I’ve already set our DVR.
Thank you to Byron and Shephard for making sure we got to see this!
MORE STAR SIGHTINGS
Two familiar faces in the The History Boys cast were Peter Paige from Showtime’s Queer As Folk and film/TV veteran Dakin Mattews. You might recognize Dakin as the mission commander in the Epcot attraction Body Wars.
While shopping in Woodland Hills we ate lunch a few tables over from Wilmer Valderrama and his entourage.
DECEMBER
Our tree is up and the last of the house decorations should be in place this week. Daryl and I will be visiting friends and family this month. If we don’t get to tell you in person, please accept our wishes for a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Until next month,
James
